Tips If Think You Want To Get Rid Of Your Pastor?

A few weeks back, I shared a popular post that my friend, Keith -- who loves pastors -- had sent me titled: "Want To Hurt You Pastor?" Well, he also sent me Part 2 to that theme. Here's my title for these thoughts: "Tips If You Think You Want To Get Rid of Your Pastor?" Read all the way to the end:

If you ever want to get rid of your pastor, instead of looking for votes or choosing up sides, try one of these five Tips.

TIP No. 1: During the Sunday morning message, listen closely and take notes. Look your pastor straight in the eye, and occasionally nod your head and say, "Amen!" Begin to make serious efforts to apply the life lessons you learn from the sermons. In six months, he'll preach himself to death.

TIP No. 2: Pat your pastor on the back and compliment his good points two or three times a month. Make a bunch of phone calls to your friends and neighbors and tell them all the good things about your pastor. In a little while, so many more people will start coming to your church, you'll have to hire many associate pastors, and your senior pastor will be free to leave.

TIP No. 3: Next Sunday, in response to the sermon, go forward to the altar and rededicate your life to Christ. Then contact the pastor asking him to give you some job you could do for the church, preferably some lost people you could go visit with a view to winning them to Christ. He'll likely die of heart failure on the spot.

TIP No. 4: Ask to help in a ministry to call on the shut-ins and elderly members of the church, and encourage the pastor, as the early church did (see Acts 6:1-7), to devote more of his time to prayer, the study of God's Word and sermon preparation. Tell him you'll see to it that the lay people take care of the widows and orphans if he'll take care of the preaching. He'll think the whole congregation has gone completely crazy and start looking for another church immediately.

TIP No. 5: Get a whole bunch of the church members to unite in earnest intercessory prayer for the pastor, his ministry and his family. Organize prayer meetings in which you pray for the growth of the church and the blessing of the pastor. The pastor may become so effective in ministry that some larger church will gladly take him off your hands.

One note of caution, however: if you try one of these Tips, you may find that you don't want to get rid of your pastor after all. :-)

Grateful